The KickAss Corrections Officers of SORT is a titanic, orderly nation, notable for its avowedly heterosexual populace, multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, and compulsory military service. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 24.684 billion SORTans are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The enormous, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, although Law & Order, Healthcare, and Education are also considered important, while International Aid receives no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Florence. The average income tax rate is 95.0%.

The frighteningly efficient SORTan economy, worth a remarkable 2,744 trillion dollars a year, is highly specialized and mostly made up of the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 111,204 dollars, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The might of the entire SORTan Navy is focused on fifty bemused spear-throwing islanders, organisations with 800 in their phone number are often raided by special forces, military equipment stores have a tendency to go up in flames, and colonies are told they'll get their sovereignty back when they finish supper. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. SORT's national animal is the eagle, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies.

SORT is ranked 260,526^th in the world and 4,245^th in The North Pacific for Most Cultured, scoring 61 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.