The Onward Light of Kaschovia is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Albus Karelka III with a fair hand, and remarkable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, unlimited-speed roads, and keen interest in outer space. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic population of 12.361 billion Kaschovians live in a state of perpetual fear, as a complete breakdown of social order has led to the rise of order through biker gangs.

The relatively small, corrupt, pro-business, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Education, and Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Kaiseva. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 35.9%.

The frighteningly efficient Kaschovian economy, worth a remarkable 3,808 trillion Kaschis a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Retail, Arms Manufacturing, and Gambling. Black market activity is rampant. Average income is an amazing 308,106 Kaschis, with the richest citizens earning 6.0 times as much as the poorest.

Albus Karelka III steals from the rich and gives to the needy, a National Academy regulates grammar and usage, physics lessons mostly involve talking about emotional management techniques, and airport users are more worried about radiation than terrorism. Crime, especially youth-related, is all-pervasive, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Kaschovia's national animal is the Kulevian Butterfly, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Atheism.

Kaschovia is ranked 1,757^th in the world and 56^th in The North Pacific for Highest Disposable Incomes, with 197,496.13 Standard Monetary Units.