The Serene Dominion of Ancient Slobovia is a gargantuan, safe nation, ruled by Empress Iris IV with an even hand, and notable for its museums and concert halls, national health service, and smutty television. The hard-nosed, democratic population of 40.537 billion Ancient Slobovians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The government — a sprawling, bureaucracy-choked morass — juggles the competing demands of Healthcare, Environment, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Constantinople. The average income tax rate is 87.2%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The thriving Ancient Slobovian economy, worth a remarkable 2,719 trillion guilders a year, is driven almost entirely by government activity. The industrial sector, which is extremely specialized, is mostly made up of the Book Publishing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is 67,097 guilders, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

All mothers are allowed six months fully-paid maternity leave, college students make ends meet by selling their kidneys, the government is pursuing a new programme aimed at promoting cultural sophistication, and the first half of cabinet meetings include Empress Iris IV complaining about the reasonable nation theory (Ancient Slobovia has found 1 easter egg). Crime is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Ancient Slobovia's national animal is the silver bear, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Ancient Slobovia is ranked 205,324^th in the world and 2,875^th in the South Pacific for Fattest Citizens, with 9.21 Obesity Rate.