The Empire of Teothopia is a mammoth, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Teo with an even hand, and renowned for its smutty television, pith helmet sales, and avant-garde cinema. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 8.927 billion Teothopians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The enormous government juggles the competing demands of Education, Healthcare, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of The Imperial Dragon's City. The average income tax rate is 95.5%.

The frighteningly efficient Teothopian economy, worth a remarkable 1,067 trillion Golden Teothopian Marks a year, is highly specialized and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Arms Manufacturing, and Book Publishing. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 119,546 Golden Teothopian Marks, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Surgical tape has taken on a distinctly red color, too many developers spoil the codebase, courtrooms can be a little sketchy, and fraternities are rejoicing at government-subsidized partying. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Teothopia's national animal is the Mystic Dragon, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies.

Teothopia is ranked 16,214^th in the world and 569^th in The North Pacific for Smartest Citizens, with 75.15 quips per hour.