The Most Serene Republic of Wooloo Unitedstrtes is a colossal, socially progressive nation, ruled by Jim Pickens with an iron fist, and remarkable for its ubiquitous missile silos, smutty television, and devotion to social welfare. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 8.618 billion Wooloo Unitedstrtesians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The medium-sized, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Administration, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Novorossilkovo. The average income tax rate is 99.3%.

The frighteningly efficient Wooloo Unitedstrtesian economy, worth a remarkable 4,532 trillion WOOPS a year, is broadly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Book Publishing, and Retail. Average income is a breathtaking 525,978 WOOPS, with the richest citizens earning 6.3 times as much as the poorest.

Most towns have their Jim Pickens High School located on Jim Pickens Street, colonial citizens are forced to sing the praise of the "Great Wooloo Unitedstrtesian Liberator", retirement homes are often fitted with luxurious suites, and people are more interested in gossip about the private lives of politicians than their policies. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Wooloo Unitedstrtes's national animal is the Wooloo, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Wooloo Unitedstrtes is ranked 3,009^th in the world and 64^th in Europe for Highest Food Quality, scoring 246.38 on the Meeshlin-Starr Index.