The Cosmic Empire of Malotihuacan is a titanic, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Malotl with an iron fist, and notable for its zero percent divorce rate, enslaved workforce, and punitive income tax rates. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 13.801 billion Malotecos are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Healthcare, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Malotitlan. The average income tax rate is 83.5%.

The frighteningly efficient Malotec economy, worth a remarkable 1,806 trillion beans a year, is led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Tourism, and Basket Weaving. Black market activity is frequent. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 130,892 beans, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.4 times as much as the poorest.

The latest Orange tablet's new peeling surface keeps the device always fresh, trolls insist that strings of racial slurs mean "good morning" in obscure languages, 42 is the answer to life the universe and the new bus route into Malotitlan, and it is said that the captain goes down with the ship but ecological protection goes up. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Malotihuacan's national animal is the Maloitzcuintle, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is the Cult of Malotec.

Malotihuacan is ranked 221,875^th in the world and 146^th in Fifth Empire for Fattest Citizens, with 8.69 Obesity Rate.