The Holy Empire of Kleczowka is a huge, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Holy Blessed Emperor Krzysztof with an iron fist, and remarkable for its rum-swilling pirates, complete lack of prisons, and zero percent divorce rate. The hard-nosed, cynical, devout population of 931 million Kleczowkans are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Spirituality, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Święta Twierdza. The average income tax rate is 47.5%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The Kleczowkan economy, worth 44.4 trillion Skrzydłoes a year, is quite specialized and dominated by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Beef-Based Agriculture, Information Technology, and Woodchip Exports. Black market activity is notable. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 47,737 Skrzydłoes, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.3 times as much as the poorest.

The might of the entire Kleczowkan Navy is focused on fifty bemused spear-throwing islanders, street preachers sell salvation with a side order of shame on every corner, children as young as twelve are conscripted into the armed forces, and a valid legal defense is 'dead men tell no tales'. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Kleczowka's national animal is the eagle, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies.

Kleczowka is ranked 117,168^th in the world and 103^rd in Fifth Empire for Largest Insurance Industry, scoring 1,595.25 on the Risk Expulsion Effectiveness Rating.