The Kingdom of Althol is a colossal, safe nation, ruled by King Althol with a fair hand, and notable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, frequent executions, and compulsory gun ownership. The compassionate, hard-working, democratic population of 2.582 billion Altholians enjoy a sensible mix of personal and economic freedoms, while the political process is open and the people's right to vote held sacrosanct.

The large, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, Defense, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Satan City. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 61.5%.

The all-consuming Altholian economy, worth 249 trillion £Althols a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Woodchip Exports, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Average income is 96,792 £Althols, with the richest citizens earning 6.1 times as much as the poorest.

King Althol's reputation is hard as nails, UFO sightings are listed daily in the morning news, commuters and their desktops both bemoan their hard drives, and pinkie promises are a matter of life and death. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Althol's national animal is the White Tigers, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Althonian.

Althol is ranked 129,330^th in the world and 43^rd in Conch Kingdom for Largest Pizza Delivery Sector, scoring 1,280.66 on the Pepperoni Propulsion Productivity Index.