The Badger Enclave of Malashaan Colony is a gargantuan, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Hello Kitty with a fair hand, and renowned for its keen interest in outer space, frequent executions, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate, democratic population of 27.288 billion Malasheens hold their civil and political rights very dear, although the wealthy and those in business tend to be viewed with suspicion.

The enormous government juggles the competing demands of Education, Healthcare, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Malastadt. The average income tax rate is 91.0%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Malashaan Colonyian economy, worth a remarkable 2,901 trillion Marks a year, is highly specialized and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism and Book Publishing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 106,347 Marks, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Human tissue is grown in vats as a delicacy as well as for transplants, political satirists and late night comedians weep as the government begins cleaning up its act, Hello Kitty's mistress is the belle at many state balls, and the nation faces constant invasions by foreign boy bands. Crime is totally unknown. Malashaan Colony's national animal is the Badger, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Malashaan Colony is ranked 271,769^th in the world and 1,163^rd in Europeia for Most Primitive, scoring -254.7 on the Scary Big Number Scale.