The God Given Lands of Der Mormia is a massive, orderly nation, ruled by Ezekiel Mizrahi with an iron fist, and remarkable for its ubiquitous missile silos, avowedly heterosexual populace, and rampant corporate plagiarism. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 1.959 billion Mormians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The large, corrupt, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, with Law & Order, Administration, and Education also on the agenda, while International Aid and Welfare receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Der Mormonische Megalith. The average income tax rate is 92.1%.

The frighteningly efficient Der Mormian economy, worth 389 trillion Der Marks a year, is broadly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, Information Technology, and Beef-Based Agriculture. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 198,872 Der Marks, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.9 times as much as the poorest.

School children asked "what is two times two?" are likely to form a symposium to discuss how different answers make them feel, bailiffs must face down a fusillade of depleted uranium rounds, not many kids know Shakespeare's Hamlet but most of them have seen unofficial sequel Hamlet III - The Search For Osric, and street preachers sell salvation with a side order of shame on every corner. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Der Mormia's national animal is the Angles, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Mormonism.

Der Mormia is ranked 307,171^st in the world and 208^th in Eladria for Largest Welfare Programs, scoring -3.16 on the Safety Net Mesh Density Rating.