by Max Barry

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Healthiest Citizens: 3rdLongest Average Lifespans: 5thNicest Citizens: 6th
The Fielzão of
Civil Rights Lovefest Nation-Hating Hippies
Timão Eô!
Influence
Power
Civil Rights
Excellent
Economy
Good
Political Freedom
Excellent

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Nuke Control Cards

Timao

Population36.866 billion

CapitalItaquerão
LeaderFofômeno and Marcelinho Carioca and Neto
FaithCoringão

CurrencyFifa Club World Cup
AnimalGavião

The Fielzão of Timao is a gargantuan, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Fofômeno and Marcelinho Carioca and Neto with a fair hand, and renowned for its infamous sell-swords, hatred of cheese, and absence of drug laws. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 36.866 billion Corinthians hold their civil and political rights very dear, although the wealthy and those in business tend to be viewed with suspicion.

The enormous government juggles the competing demands of Education, Environment, and Welfare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Itaquerão. The income tax rate is 100%.

The Timaoan economy, worth a remarkable 9,545 trillion Fifa Club World Cups a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector is mostly made up of the Information Technology industry. Average income is an amazing 258,923 Fifa Club World Cups, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Suspicious glow-in-the-dark wasps remain a source of terror and awe, dubiously qualified East Lebatuckese doctors prescribe ice baths as a treatment for pneumonia, primetime re-runs of The Black and White Minstrel Show are a critical hit, and people can't decide between preserving forests and buying print copies of 'Dogman Versus The Giggler'. Crime is totally unknown. Timao's national animal is the Gavião, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Coringão.

Timao is ranked 8th in the world and 1st in The Proletariat Coalition for Best Weather, with 4,675 meters of sunlight.

Top
1%
Healthiest Citizens: 3rdLongest Average Lifespans: 5thNicest Citizens: 6thMost Beautiful Environments: 6thBest Weather: 8thMost Cheerful Citizens: 10thMost Pacifist: 10thHighest Food Quality: 11thMost Compassionate Citizens: 12thSmartest Citizens: 18thMost Rebellious Youth: 19thHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 19thHighest Average Tax Rates: 29thMost Inclusive: 34thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 54thMost Advanced Public Education: 60thMost Cultured: 63rdMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 79thLargest Governments: 83rdMost Valuable International Artwork: 90thLargest Welfare Programs: 91stLeast Corrupt Governments: 93rdMost Advanced Public Transport: 118thHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 130thMost Stationary: 227thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 231stMost Scientifically Advanced: 282ndSafest: 347thHighest Economic Output: 587thLargest Information Technology Sector: 766thLargest Populations: 1,009thLowest Crime Rates: 1,200thMost Influential: 1,615thHighest Poor Incomes: 1,974thTop
5%
Highest Average Incomes: 3,249thMost Secular: 4,661stTop
10%
Most World Assembly Endorsements: 13,740thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 15,403rdMost Subsidized Industry: 19,220th

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Timao voted for the World Assembly Resolution "Against Destructive Raiding Practices".
  • : Following new legislation in Timao, people can't decide between preserving forests and buying print copies of 'Dogman Versus The Giggler'.
  • : Following new legislation in Timao, primetime re-runs of The Black and White Minstrel Show are a critical hit.
  • : Following new legislation in Timao, dubiously qualified East Lebatuckese doctors prescribe ice baths as a treatment for pneumonia.
  • : Following new legislation in Timao, suspicious glow-in-the-dark wasps remain a source of terror and awe.
  • : Timao was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Highest Poor Incomes and the Top 10% for Highest Wealthy Incomes.
  • : Following new legislation in Timao, foreign governments are looking into weaponizing the infamous Timaoan bee.
  • : Following new legislation in Timao, octogenarian swimsuit models insist that they've still got it.
  • : Following new legislation in Timao, crackheads chase drug-loaded drones in hopes of a lucky drop.
  • : Following new legislation in Timao, refugees from other nations are flocking to Timao's border.

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