The Retiring of Prov is a titanic, efficient nation, ruled by Santa Claus with a fair hand, and notable for its rum-swilling pirates, sprawling nuclear power plants, and compulsory military service. The compassionate, democratic population of 11.578 billion Provian Frenches are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The large, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Yggdrassil. The average income tax rate is 98.1%.

The frighteningly efficient Provian economy, worth a remarkable 2,421 trillion candy canes a year, is quite specialized and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Book Publishing, and Arms Manufacturing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 209,113 candy canes, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Apples shaped like baguettes have become a strange new food fad, windows in Yggdrassil don't have much of a view, the threat of economic apocalypse brings out the best in people, and Provian Frenches ask their doctors whether chili peppers are right for them. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Prov's national animal is the bat, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Athyism.

Prov is ranked 2,638^th in the world and 35^th in Europeia for Nicest Citizens, with 63.13 average smiles per day.