The Fmr Grand Vizier of KypsCrew is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Kyp with an even hand, and notable for its compulsory vegetarianism, vat-grown people, and ritual sacrifices. The hard-nosed, cheerful, devout population of 37.889 billion KypsCrewians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

It is difficult to tell where the omnipresent, corrupt government stops and the rest of society begins, but it juggles the competing demands of Education, Law & Order, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Parrot Bay. The average income tax rate is 98.1%.

The frighteningly efficient KypsCrewian economy, worth a remarkable 4,971 trillion doubloons a year, is driven almost entirely by government activity. The industrial sector is solely comprised of the Cheese Exports industry. Average income is an impressive 131,213 doubloons, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.1 times as much as the poorest.

Representatives soak in mineral pools at the new capitol building day spa, the numbers on the latest spending report are reaching stellar levels, a National Academy regulates grammar and usage, and students can name the chiefs of proto-Bigtopian tribes before they can count to ten. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. KypsCrew's national animal is the parrot, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Piracy.

KypsCrew is ranked 1,268^th in the world and 55^th in Osiris for Safest, scoring 152.79 on the Bubble-Rapp Safety Rating.