The Socialist Republic of Caitistana is a massive, genial nation, ruled by President Celes with an even hand, and notable for its smutty television, hatred of cheese, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, democratic population of 4.255 billion Caitistanans enjoy extensive civil rights and enjoy a level of social equality free from the usual accompanying government corruption.

The enormous, liberal, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Oobadishnah City. The average income tax rate is 92.9%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Caitistanan economy, worth 554 trillion Caitistanan Phamas a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is highly specialized, is mostly made up of the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing and Tourism. Average income is an impressive 130,275 Caitistanan Phamas, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Government officials sit helplessly as they are labelled 'Pompous Womples' by celebrities, town nameplates frequently raise giggles from passing tourists, Saturday morning cartoons feature full frontal nudity, and every week is blindness awareness week. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Caitistana's national animal is the Penguin, which frolics freely in the nation's sparkling oceans.

Caitistana is ranked 7,282^nd in the world and 94^th in The Leftist Assembly for Highest Food Quality, scoring 182.17 on the Meeshlin-Starr Index.