The Soulgodian Commonwealth of Zebastani is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by PM Joseph Hadmirak with an iron fist, and notable for its unlimited-speed roads, irreverence towards religion, and absence of drug laws. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 3.356 billion Zebastanians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The relatively small, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Defense, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Pyro. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 12.8%.

The frighteningly efficient Zebastanian economy, worth 565 trillion Zelts a year, is broadly diversified and dominated by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Retail, Arms Manufacturing, and Tourism. Black market activity is notable. Average income is an impressive 168,585 Zelts, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 774,259 per year while the poor average 22,273, a ratio of 34.8 to 1.

Curtailed social programs have left many citizens bereft of any safety net, foreign nations kill migratory animals at random in the hope that Zebastani will pay them to stop, the Department of Reduction of Bureaucratic Red Tape has set up a working committee to investigate its own excessive paperwork, and tombstones are ten feet high to accommodate the names of inhabitants. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Zebastani's national animal is the giraffe, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Zoroastrianism.

Zebastani is ranked 60,743^rd in the world and 416^th in 10000 Islands for Lowest Crime Rates, with 71.72 law-abiding acts per hour.