The Empire of Staos Cral is a massive, orderly nation, ruled by Emperor Shun with an iron fist, and renowned for its unlimited-speed roads, compulsory military service, and lack of airports. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 4.739 billion Staos Cralians are ruled with an iron fist by the corrupt, dictatorship government, which oppresses anyone who isn't on the board of a Fortune 500 company. Large corporations tend to be above the law, and use their financial clout to gain ever-increasing government benefits at the expense of the poor and unemployed.

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, although Industry, Administration, and Law & Order are also considered important, while Environment and Education aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Polar Destroyer. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 61.0%.

The frighteningly efficient Staos Cralian economy, worth a remarkable 1,176 trillion Raven Silvers a year, is broadly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Retail, Gambling, and Uranium Mining. Average income is an amazing 248,245 Raven Silvers, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 1,634,606 per year while the poor average 14,655, a ratio of 111 to 1.

Celebrity foodies are biting a huge chunk out of the government budget, censors protect the public from lewd images of Bigtopians in duffel coats, historic buildings are being demolished to allow for road-widening in the city centre, and drowning sailors are hung out to dry. Crime is pervasive, possibly because it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many regulations. Staos Cral's national animal is the Raven Hawk, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution, and its national religion is The neiglexter.

Staos Cral is ranked 289,229^th in the world and 350^th in The Black Hawks for Highest Food Quality, scoring 3.51 on the Meeshlin-Starr Index.