The Second Best Colony of Second Best Puppet 159 is a colossal, cultured nation, ruled by Noah with an even hand, and remarkable for its museums and concert halls, pith helmet sales, and free-roaming dinosaurs. The hard-nosed, humorless, devout population of 6.681 billion Second Best Puppet 159ians are highly moralistic and fiercely conservative, in the sense that they tend to believe most things should be outlawed. People who have good jobs and work quietly at them are lauded; others are viewed with suspicion.

The large, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Law & Order, and Administration. The average income tax rate is 92.0%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Second Best Puppet 159ian economy, worth a remarkable 1,167 trillion cards a year, is fairly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Retail, Information Technology, Automobile Manufacturing, and Woodchip Exports. Average income is an impressive 174,748 cards, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Bigtopian relations have become a minefield, rebuilding efforts for a recently destroyed cathedral aren't expected to be completed for another century, for just a few extra cards Second Best Puppet 159ians can get new driving records with their new cars, and rude retail employees are now even ruder homeless panhandlers. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Second Best Puppet 159's national animal is the legendary, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Second Best Puppet 159 is ranked 202,862^nd in the world and 570^th in Two for Most Primitive, scoring -83.9 on the Scary Big Number Scale.