The Fabulous Showgirl of Panian is a gargantuan, genial nation, ruled by Sister Nemain with a fair hand, and remarkable for its museums and concert halls, free-roaming dinosaurs, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful, devout population of 36.589 billion Panians are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The enormous, socially-minded, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, Environment, and Welfare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of the Isle of Apples. The average income tax rate is 92.6%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The very strong Panian economy, worth a remarkable 3,688 trillion tears a year, is highly specialized and led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing and Tourism. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 100,822 tears, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Public footpaths are being slowly eroded by the burgeoning number of ramblers, sex changes are routinely performed at Panian's hospitals, a weakened police force struggles to maintain law and order, and businesses that prove successful are immediately broken up. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Panian's national animal is the crow, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is druidism.

Panian is ranked 2,169^th in the world and 1^st in The Sands for Safest, scoring 142.34 on the Bubble-Rapp Safety Rating.