The Federation of Ostio is a massive, safe nation, ruled by President Daniel R Whitaker with an even hand, and renowned for its rum-swilling pirates, smutty television, and infamous sell-swords. The compassionate population of 1.94 billion Ostians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The large, corrupt government prioritizes Defense, although Administration, Education, and Industry are also considered important. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Washington DC. The average income tax rate is 85.6%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Ostioan economy, worth 325 trillion Dollars a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Book Publishing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 167,420 Dollars, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Arbitrary election rules are considered sacrosanct, Washington DC is a police state during international summits, young people avoid opening doors for the elderly with impunity, and there have been sightings of people walking around dressed in nothing but leopard-skin g-strings for 'religious reasons'. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Ostio's national animal is the Bald Eagle, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is First Amendment of the US Constitution.

Ostio is ranked 15,049^th in the world and 15^th in Ensio for Smartest Citizens, with 78.01 quips per hour.