The Colony of Mare Malkiyurgtopia is a colossal, efficient nation, renowned for its zero percent divorce rate, keen interest in outer space, and stringent health and safety legislation. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 7.942 billion Mare Malkiyurgtopians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Industry. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 67.6%.

The frighteningly efficient Mare Malkiyurgtopian economy, worth a remarkable 1,306 trillion florins a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Woodchip Exports, and Uranium Mining. Black market activity is rampant. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 164,456 florins, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 579,061 per year while the poor average 33,818, a ratio of 17.1 to 1.

Parents are relieved they no longer need to help with their kids' algebra homework, every diamond ring sold is accompanied by a twenty-five page analysis and a waiver, local mafias have a tough time disposing of dead snitches without catching the attention of recycling authorities, and pallbearers at military funerals dive for cover when they hear the three-volley salute. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Mare Malkiyurgtopia's national animal is the elephant, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Mare Malkiyurgtopia is ranked 188,638^th in the world and 7,198^th in Lazarus for Largest Insurance Industry, scoring -1.18 on the Risk Expulsion Effectiveness Rating.