The United Federal Republics of Ham Federation is a gargantuan, socially progressive nation, ruled by Karlotta with an even hand, and notable for its parental licensing program, compulsory military service, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate population of 11.639 billion Hamians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The large, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Education, Healthcare, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Flemery. The average income tax rate is 90.6%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Hamian economy, worth a remarkable 1,800 trillion Doll Hairs a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Arms Manufacturing, and Book Publishing. Average income is an impressive 154,655 Doll Hairs, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.0 times as much as the poorest.

RPG fans reminisce fondly about when people thought they were evil and dangerous rather than geeky and socially inept, sales of trenchcoats are on the rise, CEOs can't hear the term 'Fire Sale' without bursting into tears, and Karlotta's peyote-induced "let's all just be friends" speech is trending world-wide. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Ham Federation's national animal is the Hindslavic Hog, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Ham Federation is ranked 15,401^st in the world and 567^th in The North Pacific for Most Advanced Public Education, scoring 9,126.48 on the Edu-tellignce® Test Score.