The Colony of Klumpedoca is a huge, efficient nation, renowned for its strictly enforced bedtime, compulsory military service, and suspicion of poets. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical population of 539 million Klumpians are rabid consumers, partly through choice and partly because the government tells them to and dissenters tend to vanish from their homes at night.

The tiny, pro-business, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Klumpiteoca. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 8.4%.

The thriving Klumpian economy, worth 39.6 trillion Gold coins a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Furniture Restoration, and Uranium Mining. Average income is 73,412 Gold coins, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 321,000 per year while the poor average 10,591, a ratio of 30.3 to 1.

Billions are being spent on a new island airport, serial killers share cells with serial jaywalkers, Klumpedoca has designated Klumpiteoca as its capital city, and almost all of the nation's water is piped into the country from abroad for exorbitant prices. Crime, especially youth-related, is relatively low, thanks to a capable police force. Klumpedoca's national animal is the Totally real Great Klumpian Horse frfr, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Klumpedoca is ranked 302,199^th in the world and 393^rd in Edoca for Most Eco-Friendly Governments, scoring -6.32 on the Dolphin Recycling Awareness Index.