The Oppressed Peoples of Hellomyfriend is a huge, orderly nation, renowned for its barren, inhospitable landscape, ubiquitous missile silos, and complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 922 million Hellomyfriendians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Oldsmobile. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 34.9%.

The Hellomyfriendian economy, worth 45.2 trillion friends a year, is dominated by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Uranium Mining, Furniture Restoration, and Information Technology. Black market activity is frequent. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 49,069 friends, with the richest citizens earning 6.5 times as much as the poorest.

The military has had to quell a recent insurrection by uninsured revolutionaries, mostly women are seen and not heard, waste collection professionals have been canned, and the government seizes all major gold finds. Crime, especially youth-related, is relatively low, thanks to the all-pervasive police force. Hellomyfriend's national animal is the friends, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Hellomyfriend is ranked 310,586^th in the world and 4^th in Nikara for Smartest Citizens, with 0.71 quips per hour.