The Kingdom of East Mindoor is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by Gayle of O'Dognell with an even hand, and notable for its pith helmet sales, punitive income tax rates, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate, democratic population of 4.063 billion East Mindoorians enjoy extensive civil freedoms, particularly in social issues, while business tends to be more regulated.

The large government juggles the competing demands of Education, Healthcare, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of New Donegal. The average income tax rate is 66.4%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The all-consuming East Mindoorese economy, worth 376 trillion Mindis a year, is led by the Book Publishing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Tourism, and Basket Weaving. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is 92,699 Mindis, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Late night adverts for breast milk co-ops regularly win pornography industry awards, protests are legal but strictly supervised, Tom and Jerry cartoons have cat and mouse resolving their problems with reasoned discussion, and reflection is vital for badly behaved politicians. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. East Mindoor's national animal is the Sniffer, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Rosemarism.

East Mindoor is ranked 232,168^th in the world and 4^th in Mindoorian Federation for Most Primitive, scoring -110.83 on the Scary Big Number Scale.