The Matriarchy of Catfeine is a very large, safe nation, remarkable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, ubiquitous missile silos, and suspicion of poets. The compassionate, hard-working, democratic population of 374 million Catfeineans enjoy extensive civil freedoms, particularly in social issues, while business tends to be more regulated.

The relatively small, liberal government juggles the competing demands of Education, Welfare, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Cat Café City. The average income tax rate is 14.1%.

The thriving Catfeinean economy, worth 31.6 trillion Mocatccino Moniezzes a year, is broadly diversified and dominated by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Woodchip Exports. Average income is 84,492 Mocatccino Moniezzes, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.6 times as much as the poorest.

Prisons in Catfeine are the summer homes of murderers, professional athletes juggle part-time jobs to avoid bankruptcy, fraternities are notorious for drunken hooliganism, and farmers' market days almost always end in a shooting. Crime is almost non-existent. Catfeine's national animal is the Cat on 1 gram of Caffeine, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Catfeine is ranked 97,274^th in the world and 259^th in Horizon for Largest Insurance Industry, scoring 2,165.18 on the Risk Expulsion Effectiveness Rating.