The Artwork-Acquisition Androids of Authoritaria-Imperia is a colossal, orderly nation, ruled by E Tern Alstair with an iron fist, and remarkable for its state-planned economy, ritual sacrifices, and hatred of cheese. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 9.326 billion Authoritaria-Imperians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, although Law & Order, Healthcare, and Administration are also considered important. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Imperial Summaville. The average income tax rate is 91.1%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The powerhouse Authoritaria-Imperian economy, worth a remarkable 1,903 trillion lumens a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, highly specialized black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, and Trout Farming. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 204,089 lumens, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Illegal book-trafficking rings dominate the black market, theft is considered to be okay if the crime happened a long time ago, SWAT teams raid bathrooms in search of bathtub gin, and everyone suspects that everyone else is a terrorist. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Authoritaria-Imperia's national animal is the silver-grey wolf, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Universal Compliance.

Authoritaria-Imperia is ranked 238,866^th in the world and 7,984^th in Osiris for Most Primitive, scoring -123.34 on the Scary Big Number Scale.