The Indian District of Alappuzha is a mammoth, socially progressive nation, remarkable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, suspicion of poets, and spontaneously combusting cars. The hard-working, democratic population of 6.216 billion Alappuzhans live in a state of perpetual fear, as a complete breakdown of social order has led to the rise of order through biker gangs.

The tiny, liberal, pro-business, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, International Aid, and Welfare. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 6.9%.

The very strong Alappuzhan economy, worth 345 trillion rupees a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is fairly diversified and led by the Gambling industry, with major contributions from Uranium Mining, Retail, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Average income is 55,502 rupees, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 243,368 per year while the poor average 7,968, a ratio of 30.5 to 1.

Lobbyists are trying to convince government to recategorize most natural disasters as "non-critical naturogenic inconveniences", morale within the seismologist community has hit rock bottom, ambulances aren't allowed to overtake hearses, and art is not complete without a touch of alizarin blood and titanium sweat. Crime is a problem, probably because of the absence of a police force. Alappuzha's national animal is the Elephant, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Alappuzha is ranked 63,673^rd in the world and 8^th in India for Highest Unexpected Death Rate, scoring 62.11 on the Bus Surprisal Index.