The Empire of The Glorious Arctic Union is a gargantuan, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Supreme overlord god-emperor Jeb with an iron fist, and remarkable for its infamous sell-swords, anti-smoking policies, and pith helmet sales. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 11.749 billion Polar citizens are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, although Law & Order, Industry, and Education are also considered important, while International Aid is ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Union City. The average income tax rate is 94.3%.

The frighteningly efficient Glorious Arctic Unionian economy, worth a remarkable 3,555 trillion Bolts a year, is fairly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, and Woodchip Exports. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 302,594 Bolts, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.0 times as much as the poorest.

Human sacrifice to the metaphorical altar of Mammon ensures national prosperity, truncheon-mounted cameras record the beating of criminals in dynamic HD detail, it turns out that you actually can put a price on intangible cultural heritage, and citizens wishing to leave the country must surrender half their wealth to the government. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. The Glorious Arctic Union's national animal is the Polar bear, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Jebism.

The Glorious Arctic Union is ranked 287,359^th in the world and 1,413^th in Europe for Highest Food Quality, scoring 4.11 on the Meeshlin-Starr Index.