The Imperial Theocracy of Holy Barbarian Empire is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by Pope Alexander 'the Hermit' VII with an iron fist, and renowned for its unlimited-speed roads, public floggings, and absence of drug laws. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, devout population of 11.714 billion Imperials are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The relatively small, corrupt, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, although Industry, Law & Order, and Spirituality are also considered important, while Environment and Welfare aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Imperial City. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 27.8%.

The frighteningly efficient Imperial economy, worth a remarkable 1,647 trillion Rodins a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Retail, Information Technology, and Uranium Mining. Black market activity is frequent. Average income is an impressive 140,640 Rodins, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 980,088 per year while the poor average 6,997, a ratio of 140 to 1.

Industry tycoons rarely hide their misdeeds due to the government's habit of bailing them out, shady doctors seem to have impeccable records, waste is frequently shipped to other countries, and state-sanctioned torture is okay so long as there's no icky blood. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force. Holy Barbarian Empire's national animal is the Imperial Eagle, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution, and its national religion is Cyanism.

Holy Barbarian Empire is ranked 279,506^th in the world and 142^nd in Barbaria for Nicest Citizens, with 0.38 average smiles per day.