The Fattest Citizens in Capitalist Paradise
World Census takers tracked the sale of Cheetos and Twinkies to ascertain which nations most enjoyed the "kind bud."
As a region, Capitalist Paradise is ranked 375th in the world for Fattest Citizens.
 | Nation | WA Category | Motto | |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1. |  The Infection of Edgemaster | Father Knows Best State Suspiciously Liberal Dictatorship | “KICK LOGIC OUT AND DO THE IMPOSSIBLE!!” | |
| 2. |  The Confederacy of Gespain | Corporate Bordello Patriotic Business Zone | “Laissez faire, laissez passer” | |
| 3. |  The Perfidious Theocracy of Snorlaxia | Civil Rights Lovefest Nation-Hating Hippies | “We are always pretty” | |
| 4. |  The Free Secular Federation of Nation of Quebec | Liberal Democratic Socialists Ivory Tower Reality Disconnect Zone | “Friends Close, Enemies Closer” | |
| 5. |  The Corporate Consortium of Courathar | Capitalist Paradise Decent Hardworking Self-Starters | “Progress at any Cost” | |
| 6. |  The Corporate Empire of Mon Goog | Capitalist Paradise Decent Hardworking Self-Starters | “Greed is Good” | |
| 7. |  The Jingoistic States of Uxorem meam | Anarchy Lawless Wasteland | “Quid quid latine dictum sit, altum viditur” | |
| 8. |  The Free Domes of Meridiani Planum | Capitalizt Freedom-Loving Libertarians | “We flourish together as free men and women” | |
| 9. |  The Holy Purple Principality of Pentadbir | Capitalist Paradise Decent Hardworking Self-Starters | “He said we haven't had that spirit here since 1969” | |
| 10. |  The Libertarian Republic of Freedombourg | Left-Leaning College State Deluded Tax and Spend Hypocrites | “Live Free and Crimeless, or else...” |
