The Armed Republic of Teoil is a huge, safe nation, renowned for its free-roaming dinosaurs, public floggings, and stringent health and safety legislation. The hard-working population of 389 million Teoilians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The large government juggles the competing demands of Education, Defense, and Law & Order. The average income tax rate is 40.5%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The thriving Teoilian economy, worth 22.6 trillion Raminies a year, is dominated by the Trout Farming industry, with significant contributions from Woodchip Exports and Arms Manufacturing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 58,120 Raminies, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.2 times as much as the poorest.

Diplomatic cables about Leader have suddenly been very flattering, Teoil has designated Teoil City as its capital city, the nation is automatically assumed to be the source of all unmarked weapons, and all gamers have been drafted into the military despite their lack of upper body strength. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Teoil's national animal is the Naire Oylmit, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Teoil is ranked 187,609^th in the world and 3,991^st in The North Pacific for Most Cheerful Citizens, with 50 Percentage Of Water Glasses Perceived Half-Full.