Population | 29.901 billion |
Capital | Ravingard |
Leader | Director Vikko |
Currency | Syn |
Animal | Orca |
The Directorate of Valkalan is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Director Vikko with an even hand, and notable for its museums and concert halls, ubiquitous missile silos, and stringent health and safety legislation. The hard-nosed, hard-working, humorless population of 29.901 billion Valks are either ruled by a sleek, efficient government or a conglomerate of multinational corporations; it's difficult to tell which.
The minute, corrupt, pro-business government, or what there is of one, juggles the competing demands of Defense, Education, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Ravingard. Income tax is unheard of.
The frighteningly efficient Valk economy, worth an astonishing 22,258 trillion Syns a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Retail, Arms Manufacturing, and Uranium Mining. Average income is a breathtaking 744,404 Syns, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 3,498,875 per year while the poor average 94,233, a ratio of 37.1 to 1.
Muscular women are banned from competing in sporting competitions, convicted felons are forced into slavery for their crimes, the comic book series 'Director Vikko and the Villainous Corporate Cronies' is a best-seller, and small children are frequently chased by rehabilitated pitbulls. Crime is totally unknown. Valkalan's national animal is the Orca, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to heavy metals seepage into national waterways.
Valkalan is ranked 22,918th in the world and 1st in Zarathustra for Most Stationary, with 1,498.2990063658 days.
National Happenings
Most Recent Government Activity:
- : Following new legislation in Valkalan, small children are frequently chased by rehabilitated pitbulls.
- : Following new legislation in Valkalan, the comic book series 'Director Vikko and the Villainous Corporate Cronies' is a best-seller.
- : Following new legislation in Valkalan, convicted felons are forced into slavery for their crimes.
- : Following new legislation in Valkalan, muscular women are banned from competing in sporting competitions.
- : Following new legislation in Valkalan, cars speed down national highways while drivers sleep at the wheel.
- : Following new legislation in Valkalan, protests are legal but strictly supervised.
- : Following new legislation in Valkalan, banning party poppers has been a real party pooper.
- : Following new legislation in Valkalan, gun-wielding criminals always wear appropriate eye and ear protection.
- : Following new legislation in Valkalan, government officials are phoning up good-looking celebrities to say they want to breed with them.
- : Following new legislation in Valkalan, Director Vikko can't hear a thing when the unwashed masses throw rocks at the new state limousine.