The Queen's State of Tswanalander is a titanic, socially progressive nation, notable for its irreverence towards religion, absence of drug laws, and spontaneously combusting cars. The hard-working, democratic population of 22.487 billion Tswanalanderians live in a state of perpetual fear, as a complete breakdown of social order has led to the rise of order through biker gangs.

The minute, liberal, pro-business, outspoken government, or what there is of one, prioritizes Defense, with Healthcare, Industry, and Public Transport also on the agenda, while Spirituality and Social Policy receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Capital Heights. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 4.9%.

The strong Tswanalanderian economy, worth a remarkable 1,311 trillion betales a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Basket Weaving industry, with major contributions from Retail, Information Technology, and Gambling. Average income is 58,332 betales, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 396,592 per year while the poor average 3,134, a ratio of 126 to 1.

The alarmingly racist TV show 'Bigtopians Say the Darndest Things' is a hit, Tswanalander has designated Capital Heights as its capital city, and it is illegal for police officers to carry out searches due to strict privacy laws. Crime is a major problem, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. Tswanalander's national animal is the deer, which can occasionally be seen sifting through garbage in the nation's cities.

Tswanalander is ranked 29,795^th in the world and 1^st in Botswana for Fattest Citizens, with 15.35 Obesity Rate.