The Sultanate of Tirail is a colossal, orderly nation, ruled by Static with an iron fist, and remarkable for its compulsory vegetarianism, disturbing lack of elderly people, and complete lack of public education. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 4.784 billion Tirailians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Spirituality. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Ordrix. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 78.5%.

The frighteningly efficient Tirailian economy, worth a remarkable 1,407 trillion dollars a year, is quite specialized and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, Retail, and Woodchip Exports. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an amazing 294,274 dollars, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 1,472,839 per year while the poor average 33,022, a ratio of 44.6 to 1.

Ordrix consists only of government buildings and the mansions of government janitors, politicians look weirdly alike, weather forecasts regularly cover meteor showers, and government officials who do an offal job get smoked. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force. Tirail's national animal is the panther, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Xaos.

Tirail is ranked 318,025^th in the world and 74^th in Underworld for Most Eco-Friendly Governments, scoring -44.83 on the Dolphin Recycling Awareness Index.