The Armed Republic of Muffinses is a huge, safe nation, notable for its frequent executions, ubiquitous missile silos, and devotion to social welfare. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 602 million Muffinesians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The enormous, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Muffiscaland. The average income tax rate is 78.4%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The all-consuming Muffinsesian economy, worth 60.6 trillion Muffinoses a year, is highly specialized and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Trout Farming, and Beef-Based Agriculture. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 100,653 Muffinoses, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Government reports are now used to teach toddlers to read, a traveller who once stubbed a toe on an Air Brancaland flight has been offered asylum, people often get liposuction to reduce their air fares, and beating enemies to death with a baseball bat is legal if done within nine innings. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Muffinses's national animal is the Muffin, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Muffinses is ranked 27,971^st in the world and 465^th in the Pacific for Most Advanced Public Education, scoring 6,651.01 on the Edu-tellignce® Test Score.