The Imperial Empire of Portugal Is Great is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by Klaus Vetz with an iron fist, and renowned for its smutty television, enslaved workforce, and suspicion of poets. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 17.266 billion Portugueses are ruled with an iron fist by the corrupt, dictatorship government, which oppresses anyone who isn't on the board of a Fortune 500 company. Large corporations tend to be above the law, and use their financial clout to gain ever-increasing government benefits at the expense of the poor and unemployed.

The relatively small, corrupt, moralistic, pro-business, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Industry, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of New Lisbon. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 34.5%.

The frighteningly efficient Portugal Is Greatian economy, worth a remarkable 6,355 trillion Stolns a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Retail industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, and Information Technology. Black market activity is rampant. Average income is an amazing 368,075 Stolns, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 3,394,457 per year while the poor average 3,993, a ratio of 850 to 1.

Klaus Vetz's family members carry literal get-out-of-jail-free cards, extraordinary rendition is nothing out of the ordinary, adult unemployment is rising as available jobs are filled by young children, and tabloids coo over Klaus Vetz's expected child. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Portugal Is Great's national animal is the Housecat, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Foxism.

Portugal Is Great is ranked 1,460^th in the world and 1^st in The Labyrinth for Largest Gambling Industry, scoring 17,528.02 on the Kelly Criterion Productivity Index.