The Republic of Only Friends is a massive, efficient nation, renowned for its barren, inhospitable landscape, frequent executions, and irreverence towards religion. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic population of 2.354 billion friends are effectively ruled by a group of massive corporations, who run for political office and provide their well-off citizens with world-class goods and services. Their poorer citizens, however, are mostly starving to death while being urged to go out and get real jobs. The populace has reasonably extensive civil rights, although these are mostly aimed at allowing them to buy whatever they like.

The tiny, pro-business government is dominated by the Department of Defense, with Administration, Law & Order, and Education also on the agenda, while International Aid and Spirituality are ignored. The average income tax rate is 7.5%.

The thriving friend economy, worth 154 trillion friendships a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Uranium Mining, Gambling, and Door-to-door Insurance Sales. Average income is 65,608 friendships, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.8 times as much as the poorest.

Tuxedo rental companies are inexplicably going out of business, they unpaved paradise and tore up a parking lot (ooh, bop bop bop), economists confusingly list "fusarium rot and leaf blight" as major risk factors for monetary deflation, and comatose jurors are the defense's favorite. Crime is moderate, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. Only Friends's national animal is the Boston, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Only Friends is ranked 260,603^rd in the world and 2^nd in BL Nations for Most Compassionate Citizens, scoring 39.43 on the Kitten Softness Rating.