The Republic of Newit is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by President Nick with an even hand, and remarkable for its museums and concert halls, barren, inhospitable landscape, and smutty television. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic, humorless, devout population of 2.576 billion Newitians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The relatively small government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Industry, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Nickin. The average income tax rate is 23.9%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Newitian economy, worth 454 trillion dollars a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Retail industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Automobile Manufacturing, and Uranium Mining. Average income is an impressive 176,436 dollars, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.4 times as much as the poorest.

Loud Patriotic Music Day has been ranked the seventh best new holiday of the year, nose plugs are the latest Newitian fashion accessory, no suburban lawn is complete without barbed wire and landmines, and school lessons are constantly interrupted by 'teacher needs a break' time. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Newit's national animal is the bald eagle, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Christianity.

Newit is ranked 315,623^rd in the world and 35^th in Antarctica for Most Eco-Friendly Governments, scoring -5.48 on the Dolphin Recycling Awareness Index.