The People's Republic of Moldtina is a mammoth, genial nation, ruled by King J of Moldina with an even hand, and notable for its keen interest in outer space, pith helmet sales, and ubiquitous missile silos. The compassionate, devout population of 6.849 billion Moldtinans have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The medium-sized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Defense, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Moldina City. The average income tax rate is 54.6%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Moldtinan economy, worth 704 trillion Moldols a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Retail, and Arms Manufacturing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 102,823 Moldols, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Convicts released after being found "wrongfully imprisoned" are surprisingly chill about the whole thing, high school boys are required to pass vigorous self-mastery and sensitivity training to graduate, estate agents justify funky smells by revealing how often the previous owners showered, and sales of disinfectant wipes have skyrocketed. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Moldtina's national animal is the Eagle, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Moldiology.

Moldtina is ranked 19,874^th in the world and 21^st in Philosophers for Most Cultured, scoring 88 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.