The Lazy Lumps of Lazulite is a titanic, orderly nation, ruled by Minas Gerais with an iron fist, and remarkable for its compulsory gun ownership, suspicion of poets, and stringent health and safety legislation. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 23.203 billion Lazuliteans are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Styria. The average income tax rate is 91.7%.

The frighteningly efficient Lazulitean economy, worth a remarkable 5,087 trillion Lasers a year, is fairly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Uranium Mining, and Furniture Restoration. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an amazing 219,261 Lasers, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.7 times as much as the poorest.

Debating the meaning of life is widely viewed as a crucifying experience, travelers praise airports for their endless beige corridors, the government dismisses unpopular legislation as a "misclick", and pension obligations are building. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Lazulite's national animal is the Limpet, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Cynicism.

Lazulite is ranked 327,108^th in the world and 4^th in Medio for Largest Insurance Industry, scoring -15.29 on the Risk Expulsion Effectiveness Rating.