by Max Barry

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Highest Crime Rates: 2,497thLargest Black Market: 3,531stMost Subsidized Industry: 4,079th
The Founder of
Moralistic Democracy Ordinary Decent Hardworking People
Founder of Zambia
Influence
Dominator
Region
Civil Rights
Unheard Of
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Some

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Kitwe

Population30.786 billion

CapitalKitwe
LeaderLeader

Currencycash
Animalbeast

The Founder of Kitwe is a gargantuan, genial nation, ruled by Leader with an even hand, and renowned for its public floggings, enslaved workforce, and ritual sacrifices. The compassionate, humorless, devout population of 30.786 billion Kitweans are highly moralistic and fiercely conservative, in the sense that they tend to believe most things should be outlawed. People who have good jobs and work quietly at them are lauded; others are viewed with suspicion.

It is difficult to tell where the omnipresent, corrupt, moralistic government stops and the rest of society begins, but it juggles the competing demands of Defense, Administration, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Kitwe. The average income tax rate is 85.2%.

The frighteningly efficient Kitwean economy, worth a remarkable 2,848 trillion cashes a year, is driven almost entirely by government activity, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, extremely specialized black market in Information Technology and Arms Manufacturing. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. State-owned companies are the norm. Average income is 92,530 cashes, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.1 times as much as the poorest.

Members of the government all have oddly similar anecdotes about their childhoods, the nation's faithful often say there is a higher power watching over them, apples shaped like baguettes have become a strange new food fad, and diplomats agree to the terms and conditions of peace treaties without reading them. Crime is pervasive, possibly because it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many regulations. Kitwe's national animal is the beast, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Kitwe is ranked 302,106th in the world and 2nd in Zambia for Largest Manufacturing Sector, scoring 929.62 on the Gooback-Jerbs Productivity Index.

Top
1%
Highest Crime Rates: 2,497thTop
5%
Largest Black Market: 3,531stMost Subsidized Industry: 4,079thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 5,006thMost Avoided: 5,288thLargest Populations: 5,705thNudest: 6,080thMost Cultured: 6,329thMost Advanced Public Education: 6,550thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 9,002ndMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 9,114thHighest Economic Output: 10,350thHighest Food Quality: 12,647thHighest Average Tax Rates: 12,647thHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 13,227thMost Developed: 14,111thTop
10%
Most World Assembly Endorsements: 19,285thMost Patriotic: 20,378thHealthiest Citizens: 23,998thMost Conservative: 24,090thLongest Average Lifespans: 24,152ndSmartest Citizens: 30,401st

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Kitwe, diplomats agree to the terms and conditions of peace treaties without reading them.
  • : Following new legislation in Kitwe, apples shaped like baguettes have become a strange new food fad.
  • : Following new legislation in Kitwe, the nation's faithful often say there is a higher power watching over them.
  • : Following new legislation in Kitwe, members of the government all have oddly similar anecdotes about their childhoods.
  • : Kitwe was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Most Conservative.
  • : Following new legislation in Kitwe, government-sponsored gallows are being erected by Violetist temples.
  • : Following new legislation in Kitwe, pop stars who make it big overseas are hailed as economic heroes.
  • : Following new legislation in Kitwe, medical staff can legally quiet people who ask for a second helping of Salisbury steak.
  • : Following new legislation in Kitwe, lifelong celibates are surprised to receive government-issue condoms in the post.
  • : Following new legislation in Kitwe, arthritic citizens seem underrepresented at royal meet-and-greets.

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