The Eternal Republic of Ignatia is a titanic, safe nation, ruled by Ignatius VIII with an even hand, and renowned for its museums and concert halls, avant-garde cinema, and aversion to nipples. The compassionate, devout population of 13.786 billion Ignatians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The government — a sprawling, bureaucracy-choked morass — prioritizes Healthcare, with Education, Spirituality, and Welfare also on the agenda. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Ignatia Aeternum. The average income tax rate is 80.9%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The strong Ignatian economy, worth 789 trillion Ignums a year, is highly specialized and mostly made up of the Book Publishing industry. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is 57,287 Ignums, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Mathematicians are hated by children across the country, students learn how to disarm mines before understanding basic arithmetic, primary candidates are replaced if they fail to compliment Ignatius VIII's hair, and voting for pro-Bigtopian candidates is voluntary. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Ignatia's national animal is the Pheonix, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Ignatian Catholicism.

Ignatia is ranked 11,640^th in the world and 1^st in The Fire Tree Coalition for Nicest Citizens, with 28.74 average smiles per day.