The Union of Etild is a titanic, genial nation, ruled by Qijzunu Iflokok with an even hand, and renowned for its rampant corporate plagiarism, punitive income tax rates, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate population of 18.858 billion Etildians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The enormous, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Welfare, Law & Order, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Levanovo Hopa. The average income tax rate is 67.8%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The large but inefficient Etildian economy, worth 548 trillion Etildian dollars a year, is quite specialized and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Cheese Exports, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Information Technology. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 29,059 Etildian dollars, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Foreigners with shady pasts are fleeing the country, political candidates who don't release their birth certificates are presumed to have been born in Maxtopia, the nation has opened its arms to an influx of refugees, and code enforcement officers circle wealthy Etildians like vultures. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Etild's national animal is the flying chicken, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Etild is ranked 254,192^nd in the world and 19^th in Popuko for Highest Unexpected Death Rate, scoring 27.7 on the Bus Surprisal Index.