The Republic of Esst is a massive, genial nation, ruled by the moral leader of esst with an even hand, and renowned for its compulsory military service, enslaved workforce, and suspicion of poets. The compassionate, hard-working, devout population of 1.447 billion Esstians are highly moralistic and fiercely conservative, in the sense that they tend to believe most things should be outlawed. People who have good jobs and work quietly at them are lauded; others are viewed with suspicion.

The medium-sized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Defense, and Healthcare. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 30.9%.

The very strong Esstian economy, worth 74.6 trillion euros a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Beef-Based Agriculture industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Cheese Exports, and Woodchip Exports. Black market activity is notable. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 51,582 euros, with the richest citizens earning 8.4 times as much as the poorest.

The nation's navy has been named the scourge of the seven thousand seas, scenic beaches are now protected by massive concrete walls, consumption of cat memes has skyrocketed, and those who don't have a bean to spend don't know a bean about Brasilistanian coffee beans. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, despite the fact that it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many laws. Esst's national animal is the bears, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Esst is ranked 56,913^th in the world and 3^rd in Oulusian union for Largest Insurance Industry, scoring 3,491.69 on the Risk Expulsion Effectiveness Rating.