The Matriarchy of Despatch is a colossal, safe nation, renowned for its barren, inhospitable landscape and irreverence towards religion. The hard-working population of 4.92 billion Despatchians are highly moralistic and fiercely conservative, in the sense that they tend to believe most things should be outlawed. People who have good jobs and work quietly at them are lauded; others are viewed with suspicion.

The medium-sized government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Welfare, and Defense. The average income tax rate is 27.1%.

The strong Despatchian economy, worth 201 trillion Delta Eagles a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Uranium Mining industry, with major contributions from Cheese Exports, Book Publishing, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Average income is 40,962 Delta Eagles, with the richest citizens earning 5.1 times as much as the poorest.

A speech a day keeps climate change away, no one gossips with Leader during diplomatic summits, it's believed that women's brains will overheat if they think for themselves, and Leader has just been declared ruler of Despatch in an international press conference. Crime, especially youth-related, is well under control, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Despatch's national animal is the Kitsune, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Despatch is ranked 134,763^rd in the world and 5^th in Cruiser Fleet for Most Eco-Friendly Governments, scoring 500.3 on the Dolphin Recycling Awareness Index.