The Holy Empire of Celdern is a colossal, cultured nation, ruled by Aurelian IX with an iron fist, and renowned for its free-roaming dinosaurs, keen interest in outer space, and complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 3.38 billion Celdernites are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Jerusalem. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 81.8%.

The frighteningly efficient Celdernic economy, worth 666 trillion Celdernic Flames a year, is broadly diversified and dominated by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Retail, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Black market activity is extensive. Average income is an impressive 197,280 Celdernic Flames, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 599,003 per year while the poor average 50,492, a ratio of 11.9 to 1.

The taste of spices can sail a thousand ships, any body part that can be cut off a person is no longer considered to be their property, emergency responders spend more time in the air than giving air, and the law is more interested in punishing crime than preventing it. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Celdern's national animal is the Phoenix, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution, and its national religion is Sacred Protestant Christianity.

Celdern is ranked 99,754^th in the world and 9^th in THE SUPER POWERS for Largest Trout Fishing Sector, scoring 2,955.3 on the Nemo Depletion Efficiency Index.