The Catholic Protectorate of Ceilidh is a colossal, genial nation, ruled by High Abbot Regis with an even hand, and notable for its ritual sacrifices, pith helmet sales, and state-planned economy. The compassionate, democratic, devout population of 4.367 billion Ceilidhians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The relatively small government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Law & Order, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Portus Sancti Brendani. The average income tax rate is 13.6%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The strong Ceilidhian economy, worth 160 trillion Cláirseaches a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is extremely specialized, is mostly made up of the Trout Farming industry, with significant contributions from Retail. Average income is 36,719 Cláirseaches, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Art is not complete without a touch of alizarin blood and titanium sweat, High Abbot Regis can finally stop kneading the dough and start rolling in it instead, houses and businesses are bulldozed to make way for ever-expanding cemeteries, and boys who even ask about cheerleading are placed on the Sex Offenders Register. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force. Ceilidh's national animal is the Lion, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Catholicism.

Ceilidh is ranked 219,572^nd in the world and 8^th in Antarctic Oasis for Highest Disposable Incomes, with 31,725.27 Standard Monetary Units.