The Dēmokratia of All Cyprus is a titanic, efficient nation, ruled by Autokratōr Anaxágoras Alkidis with an even hand, and notable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, compulsory military service, and suspicion of poets. The quiet, industrious population of 11.431 billion Cypriots have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The medium-sized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Law & Order, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Nicosia. The average income tax rate is 30.2%.

The strong Cypriot economy, worth 682 trillion Lire a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Door-to-door Insurance Sales industry, with significant contributions from Woodchip Exports, Cheese Exports, and Information Technology. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 59,748 Lire, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.6 times as much as the poorest.

Vacationers and business travelers are often warned that they may lose the right to vote if they spend too much time overseas, ambulances aren't allowed to overtake hearses, it is illegal to distribute Girl Guide Cookies without an advanced food hygiene diploma, and droves of former desperados are applying to join the border police. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. All Cyprus's national animal is the Agrino, which can occasionally be seen sifting through garbage in the nation's cities, and its national religion is Eastern Orthodox Christianity.

All Cyprus is ranked 101,756^th in the world and 9^th in The Equator for Highest Poor Incomes, with 30,220.85 Standard Monetary Units.