The Phantasm of Afi-Aftos is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by El Guapo with an even hand, and remarkable for its multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, anti-smoking policies, and complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, humorless population of 39.505 billion Afi-Aftosians are highly moralistic and fiercely conservative, in the sense that they tend to believe most things should be outlawed. People who have good jobs and work quietly at them are lauded; others are viewed with suspicion.

The large, corrupt government is primarily concerned with Industry, with Administration and Healthcare also on the agenda, while Social Policy and Welfare receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Loompaland. The average income tax rate is 85.1%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Afi-Aftosian economy, worth a remarkable 8,258 trillion Fishterous Correlations a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, highly specialized black market in Uranium Mining, Retail, and Furniture Restoration. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 209,053 Fishterous Correlations, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Ad hoc militias patrol the streets in an effort to control rampant crime, disaster relief budgets are growing like wildfire, the government is telling wizards to put their heart into their work, and posing for pictures is an integral part of military training. Crime is all-pervasive, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Afi-Aftos's national animal is the Vermicious Knid, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Dudeism.

Afi-Aftos is ranked 143,627^th in the world and 7^th in Fredonia for Highest Disposable Incomes, with 31,149 Standard Monetary Units.