The Kingdom of Ciffeer is a colossal, cultured nation, renowned for its museums and concert halls, complete lack of prisons, and pith helmet sales. The compassionate, democratic, devout population of 9.644 billion Ciffeerians are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The enormous, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Ciffeer City. The average income tax rate is 99.1%.

The frighteningly efficient Ciffeerian economy, worth a remarkable 1,922 trillion Urhals a year, is highly specialized and mostly made up of the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing and Tourism. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 199,315 Urhals, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Years of counter-terrorism planning are foiled by small details, flipping a coin to make a decision leads to a referral to Gambling Addiction Services, most of the nation's wealthy aristocrats are dentists, and the government puts forth the claim that harming young girls is wrong. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Ciffeer's national animal is the Lion, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Ciffeer is ranked 1,344^th in the world and 42^nd in Osiris for Safest, scoring 156.5 on the Bubble-Rapp Safety Rating.